"Ask around. Look it up. Slayer, comma, The."
- Xander: For a minute there, I thought you were gonna make an expression.
- Oz: Well, I felt one comin' on. I won't lie.
- Willow: The school paper is edging on depressing, lately. Have you guys noticed that?
- Oz: I don't know. I always go strait to the obits
- Xander: You know, Oz, I look at all this beauty, all these healthy young women and I wonder why I ever wasted my time on Cordelia. I mean, look at her. She's no better lookin' than the rest of 'em.
- Oz: None of them are really my...
- Xander: Oh, my God! He's lookin' at her. He's got his filthy adult Pierce Brosnany eyes all over my Cordy.
- Oz: You're a very complex man, aren't you?
- Xander: And you are...?
- [Oz reveals a name tag saying "GOD"]
- Xander: Of course.
- Xander: Wish I'd thought of that before I put down my deposit. I could've been God.
- Oz: Blasphemer.
- Willow: Where's supportive boyfriend guy?
- Oz: Oh, he's picking up your dry-cleaning, but he told me to tell you he's afraid you're gonna get hurt.
- Xander: Prepare to have your spines tingled and your gooses bumped by the terrifying... Fantasia. Fantasia?
- Oz: Maybe it's 'cause of all the horrific things we've seen, but, hippos wearing tutus just don't unnerve me the way they used to.
- Xander: Phantasm. It was supposed to be Phantasm. Stupid video store.
- Buffy, Anya, Willow, Xander, Giles, Tara: [singing] There's nothing we can't face.
- Anya: [singing] Except for bunnies.
- [after Buffy is ordered by Giles to deal with a singing demon on her own]
- Spike: Forget them slayer, I got your back.
- Buffy: Thought you wanted me to stay away from you. Isn't that what you sang?
- Xander: Spike sing a "widdle" song?
- Anya: Would you say it was a breakaway pop hit, or more of a book number?
- Xander: Let it go sweetie.
- Dawn: [excited] Oh my God. You will never believe what happened at school today.
- Buffy: Everybody started singing and dancing?
- Dawn: [pauses, deflating] I gave birth to a pterodactyl.
- Anya: Oh my God, did it sing?
So, Dawn’s in trouble… must be Tuesday.
— Buffy
Well, I’m not exactly quaking in my stylish yet affordable boots, but there’s definitely something unnatural going on here. And that doesn’t usually lead to hugs and puppies.
— Buffy
[singing] “I’ve been having a bad bad day. Come on, won’t you put that pad away? I’m asking you please no. It isn’t right, it isn’t fair. There was no parking anywhere. I think that hydrant wasn’t there. Why can’t you let it go? I think I’ve paid more than my share. I’m just a poor girl, don’t you care? Hey, I’m not wearing underwear!
— Parking Ticket Woman
